When you write a regular column, one of the first things you learn is to
write down any interesting, unusual or funny thing that you run across. I
can't remember how many times I've been talking to Suzie Isaacs, when
all of a sudden she pulls out a pad and pen. I always thought she was a
little strange. But guess what? Now I do it all the time.
Most of the time, you can't make a whole column out of a little story that
you hear, so after a while you end up with a whole bunch of "little,"
interesting, unusual and funny stories. I decided to see if I could devote
a column to a few of the more funny or interesting ones...
• One night Rich Korbin, Pete Barbas, and myself were having dinner
at Binion's Horseshoe. After a couple of trips each to the buffet, Pete
and I were done and Rich had to make one more trip, so he politely
excused himself and left. After what seemed like an awful long time he
finally returned.
I casually asked, "Rich, what took you so long?" Rich gave me an
irritated look and said, "I got behind some lady that was walking slower
than someone going to their own execution." I said, "Wow!" Rich went
on to say, "That lady took 5 minutes to decide whether she wanted 2 or
3 pieces of celery."
• At a recent tournament I had the pleasure of sitting next to
Cowboy Wolford for 3 or 4 hours. If you can get Cowboy to talking about
the old days in Vegas with his old buddies, you are in store for a treat.
In case you didn't know, Cowboy ended up writing a book called
Cowboys, Gamblers & Hustlers. It's a great book with many humorous
and unusual stories about Poker and Rodeo.
One of the little stories Cowboy told me that didn't get into his book was
about Benny Binnion. Cowboy told me about his sure-fire method of
getting anything he wanted at the Horseshoe. It was simple, he just
found the right button to press with Benny. He would just get Benny
aside and say, "Hey Benny, you got enough pull around here to get (so
and so) done, or not?" Cowboy said Benny would bristle and take this
as a personal challenge. He would always answer the same way, "What
do you mean do I have enough pull around here? I own this S.O.B. What
ya trying to get done?" Cowboy said Benny would automatically pick up
the phone and whatever it was. he'd get it done. Cowboy said it worked
every time.
• A couple of years ago Jack Fox and I made the final table in a no-
limit holdem tournament at the Legends of Poker Tournament. A big pot
came up between two of the other players. One player opened the pot
for a medium sized bet and the other player made a substantial raise.
Jack, who was sitting right next to me, leaned over and whispered, "211
in progress." It took me a couple of seconds but finally I got it. 211 is the
police terminology for an armed robbery in progress.
• Of course there's my wife Debbie, who loves me with all her heart,
but sometimes she just says the wrong thing. A few months ago Linda
Johnson asked if I would participate in a poker seminar on board one of
the poker cruises. Naturally, I said yes. It never hurts to kiss up to the
boss. So in preparation, I spent some time running through different
openings. Finally, after much agony I thought I had it. I decided to try it
out on my wife. When I had finished I said, "Well Deb, what do you
think? Any suggestions?" She looked at me said, "It's okay honey, but
don't try to be so witty and intellectual. Just be yourself."
• John Bonafede is an old friend of mine who sometimes comes to
the tournaments with me. John does not play poker, so I never have to
hear any bad beat stories from him. However, I do hear things from him
that are funny.
John gets some of the poker terminology mixed up. For instance he
sometimes calls the flop--the flip. Once. when he first started coming
around with me to the clubs, he heard Bob Thompson make an
announcement, " No sweaters at the table." He later asked me quite
seriously, "Why can't you wear a sweater at the table?"
The one that always make me chuckle is once I was looking for a mutual
friend of ours. I asked John if he had seen him when John responded,
"Yeah. I saw him standing by the bird rail." When I heard that, I couldn't
help but laugh. John didn't know what was so funny. After all, he'd heard
the term railbird used so often, he just logically concluded that the rail
where railbird's stand must be called the bird rail. Matter of fact, I don't
know why it isn't called the bird rail.
For what it's worth …
write down any interesting, unusual or funny thing that you run across. I
can't remember how many times I've been talking to Suzie Isaacs, when
all of a sudden she pulls out a pad and pen. I always thought she was a
little strange. But guess what? Now I do it all the time.
Most of the time, you can't make a whole column out of a little story that
you hear, so after a while you end up with a whole bunch of "little,"
interesting, unusual and funny stories. I decided to see if I could devote
a column to a few of the more funny or interesting ones...
• One night Rich Korbin, Pete Barbas, and myself were having dinner
at Binion's Horseshoe. After a couple of trips each to the buffet, Pete
and I were done and Rich had to make one more trip, so he politely
excused himself and left. After what seemed like an awful long time he
finally returned.
I casually asked, "Rich, what took you so long?" Rich gave me an
irritated look and said, "I got behind some lady that was walking slower
than someone going to their own execution." I said, "Wow!" Rich went
on to say, "That lady took 5 minutes to decide whether she wanted 2 or
3 pieces of celery."
• At a recent tournament I had the pleasure of sitting next to
Cowboy Wolford for 3 or 4 hours. If you can get Cowboy to talking about
the old days in Vegas with his old buddies, you are in store for a treat.
In case you didn't know, Cowboy ended up writing a book called
Cowboys, Gamblers & Hustlers. It's a great book with many humorous
and unusual stories about Poker and Rodeo.
One of the little stories Cowboy told me that didn't get into his book was
about Benny Binnion. Cowboy told me about his sure-fire method of
getting anything he wanted at the Horseshoe. It was simple, he just
found the right button to press with Benny. He would just get Benny
aside and say, "Hey Benny, you got enough pull around here to get (so
and so) done, or not?" Cowboy said Benny would bristle and take this
as a personal challenge. He would always answer the same way, "What
do you mean do I have enough pull around here? I own this S.O.B. What
ya trying to get done?" Cowboy said Benny would automatically pick up
the phone and whatever it was. he'd get it done. Cowboy said it worked
every time.
• A couple of years ago Jack Fox and I made the final table in a no-
limit holdem tournament at the Legends of Poker Tournament. A big pot
came up between two of the other players. One player opened the pot
for a medium sized bet and the other player made a substantial raise.
Jack, who was sitting right next to me, leaned over and whispered, "211
in progress." It took me a couple of seconds but finally I got it. 211 is the
police terminology for an armed robbery in progress.
• Of course there's my wife Debbie, who loves me with all her heart,
but sometimes she just says the wrong thing. A few months ago Linda
Johnson asked if I would participate in a poker seminar on board one of
the poker cruises. Naturally, I said yes. It never hurts to kiss up to the
boss. So in preparation, I spent some time running through different
openings. Finally, after much agony I thought I had it. I decided to try it
out on my wife. When I had finished I said, "Well Deb, what do you
think? Any suggestions?" She looked at me said, "It's okay honey, but
don't try to be so witty and intellectual. Just be yourself."
• John Bonafede is an old friend of mine who sometimes comes to
the tournaments with me. John does not play poker, so I never have to
hear any bad beat stories from him. However, I do hear things from him
that are funny.
John gets some of the poker terminology mixed up. For instance he
sometimes calls the flop--the flip. Once. when he first started coming
around with me to the clubs, he heard Bob Thompson make an
announcement, " No sweaters at the table." He later asked me quite
seriously, "Why can't you wear a sweater at the table?"
The one that always make me chuckle is once I was looking for a mutual
friend of ours. I asked John if he had seen him when John responded,
"Yeah. I saw him standing by the bird rail." When I heard that, I couldn't
help but laugh. John didn't know what was so funny. After all, he'd heard
the term railbird used so often, he just logically concluded that the rail
where railbird's stand must be called the bird rail. Matter of fact, I don't
know why it isn't called the bird rail.
For what it's worth …
Once Upon a Time
By Vince Burgio
By Vince Burgio
